2013 is gone. While there were many joys, happiness, reconcilization, and redemption in 2013, there were also the struggles, disappointments, and hardships. As a great man once told me, “leave the past behind you. It is called past for a reason.” I firmly believe that, but also don’t forget it, allow it to reshape you and mold you into a better you. 2013 did reshape me. I am a completely different, better me than I was this time last year.
I have great expectations for 2014. The year of being renewed and having all things added back to me and in double portion. I know 2014 for me will be a year of great changes; changes in mindsets, relationships, and priorities. That does not go without saying that I don’t have my part in it. That would be foolish, lol. After prayerful consideration, I have 5 areas that I expect change. My part and God’s part included. So I call these commitments, not resolutions. To me resolutions, just mean one is determined to make a change. But for me, unless one is committed to the change, determination means nothing.
1. Stop worrying about finances despite some previous bad spending decisions and the dreaded student loans. Believe that God will turn it around. I need to stop having the poverty mindset. I will do my part to create a better household budget, follow it more strictly, pay off some debt, and save money. My part includes actively growing my business, publishing research, and pursuing the same vision and staying on track for our church’s community center—this latter part means finishing the proposal asap.
2. Plugging more into the presence of God rather than technology. That means less social media…yes I admit, I am a total facebook junky..sad, but true. Also in line with point #1, perhaps cancelling cable completely. It will save money and remove the temptation to plug into it, rather than into the Word. I’m terrible with this, especially at night when I need to unwind, I always turn on the tv, often leaving me more stressed–Nighttime news…bad..evil. It’s a horrible trap for me. Don’t even get me started on the HGTV channel, love it, but always walking away wanting to do things to the house that cost money we don’t have–it is evil I tell you ;).
3. Despite the circumstances, always find the positive and to be thankful for what we do have. Ever notice how easy it is to focus on the negative and what is going wrong, rather than what is positive. I have to level with you, I was repeatedly called out on this one in 2013. My life is pretty blessed, despite the messes.
4. Serve others more and stop worrying about them recognizing me in appreciation. Oh, I was so bad at this, especially with my husband. It was like I was always expecting him to recognize that I did x and then expect a big appraisal for it. Truth is most men don’t notice the simple things anyway. Besides if I am expecting him to praise me, then my focus is off. That is, serving my family has nothing to do with them, but only about me. Countless times when I would get upset that I wasn’t recognized, I would hear the Lord quietly say to me, “it’s not about you, but what I am doing through your service”. I need to let go of wanting credit. Lord, help me be a better wife and mother without expecting credit for every little thing.
5. I need to work diligently on a few projects rather than spreading myself too thin. Anyone who knows me, knows I am notorious for having several things going on at once and never getting any down time. Therefore, after careful prayful consideration I am narrowing my time to the following projects: finishing my dissertation (graduating in 2014), YIDC project, PM community garden, and our business. Outside this is time for my family, students, close friends, and downtime for me. Anything outside these parameters, I just don’t have time for.
6. I am restricting myself to things that encouraging and uplifting. I need to cut out anything and anyone that attempts to steal my joy, passion, or becomes discouraging and negative.
7. Being more prepared for changes ahead. This sort of goes with #1, but in a more elaborate way. It’s not just about getting one’s house in order financially, it’s more about what could lie ahead. Most of you know, I am a huge planner. In 2014, I plan to take this to another level. Being prepare for emergencies and building relationships in the community who have the same mentality. In 2013 when our hot water heater went, it was like the end of the world. Haha, you would think that someone like me, who has had survival training would have no problem boiling water for a hot bath. Truth be told, I got too use to comforts, and we didn’t prepare an adequate emergency fund.
8. Focus on relationships that are reciprocal. I have spent too much of my life trying to impressed others, trying to get them to like me, accept me. In 2013, I learned two very important lessons regarding relationships. First, those who don’t accept you for whatever reason, usually has nothing to do with you, but everything to do with them. Second, truth be told, those who want to be apart of our lives, will do so on purpose. With those in mind, I pray the Lord with reveal more of the forever friends and the seasonal friends.
9. Empower and encourage others daily. Again, it’s so easy to focus on the lack, the negative, but what good does that do for any of us. My commitment for 2014 is to empower/encourage at least one person each day.
10. Continue to speak truth despite people’s reactions. Often I feel I am caught between two vastly different communities–faith and academia. For years, I’ve worried about how both perceive me. I need to stop worrying and ask provoking questions. Jesus was a man of provoking questions. He didn’t care how others perceived him.
Those are my 10 commitments. I believe there is much responsibility in putting them out there. It keeps me in check about what I post, talk about, and think regularly.
I wish everyone a blessed, prosperous (in spirit and physical), and happy 2014.
Ultimate Love Story 